My Denial : Dan x Phil Phanfic
by DudeItsDessi
Summary: If your looking for a less raunchy, and more of a realistic and romantic based fiction of Dan and Phil- then you've come to the right place. You will discover, through the realistic thoughts of Phil - of what type of person he truly is. Follow through the eyes of Phil, during this tale, of how his hidden underlining affection for Dan eventually blossoms in the most unexpected way.
1. Preface: Phil's Inner Character

Preface:

It is nothing more, or nothing less than our friendship which keeps us bound. Although, this is what feeds my hope: that eventually I will have more. This ill craving that I have for Dan, when we are together, I bury with a huge secret that I constantly stuff in the back of my mind. The inner-goddess in my mind reminds me ever-so-fluently, but I pretend that she is not there. Denial: which, ironically enough, is also the first stage of grief. I'm obviously not depressed, so I might be experiencing love or lust or something of that nature.

I'm Phillip Lester and I make awesome YouTube videos. That's pretty much the jest of it. Although, I am in my mid 20s; some tend to forget that because of my kid-like nostalgia. Even though that is naturally me; on the camera and off the camera are two different shades of who I am. Fans forget and sometimes even Dan forgets.

But, when I look I Dan - when I truly look at him - I know how my heart feels. I know I'm pushing off these feelings; its fear. I don't want to believe what my heart feels is reality, - because when and if I do, I would not be able to stop what I have started. It would be a huge mistake: for our fans, for BBC Radio, for our friendship, and for being able to live together at all. Our entire lives would fall apart.


	2. Chapter 1: Mysterious Plans

**_*Disclaimer- My goal here was to make this Fic realistic. Thus, just as how in a book, this first chapter is usually the most boring. Don't be bombarded by this fact. Enjoy it. It will get interesting soon enough my lovelies [;*_**

Chapter 1:

I woke up to the morning sun shining blissfully through the flat's windows. After a few moments of regaining consciousness, I shuffle out of bed and welcome the sun's rays through my pores as I walk towards the only window in my bedroom. I look outside for a moment, remembering the last flat Dan and I lived in, where we could see Manchester's Big Wheel from the window every morning glowing in luminous beauty. I miss Manchester and especially the Big Wheel. It holds many memories of Dan and I in Manchester's eye- and that night when we were together to meet other You Tubers for Halloween. We didn't meet much of anyone but that didn't matter, because by the end I discovered that I really didn't care much about the other You Tubers anyways, and I only wanted to spend more time with him.

I quickly moved past the memories rushing through my mind as I rank myself with more important issues during the moment as distraction.

"I suppose I need to shower"

I say to myself, almost as if the thoughts I was imaging just a second ago where never accumulated.

I scuttle my way out of my room, and into the open space of the flat with an intention to make my way to the bathroom in between our rooms. I roam down the small hallway-like space, and then make my way to the bathroom door, where I turn the doorknob with confidence and ease. I open the door, and unexpectedly hear a surprised yelp from the other side.

"Oh damn it Phil!" Dan projected

"You scared the hell out of me!"

I was able to look at the full image of Dan now and realized he was wearing only his boxers, and had a tooth-brush in hand. His body - smooth and slender, waist long, and boxers hanging delicately over his narrow hips - is all before my eyes at a very instant which left me feeling sort of flushed. I'm guessing he just woke up as well, but my mind shifted deeper than just that thought, and I realized that it was immensely difficult to keep my eyes from wondering on his body. I curved my mouth in a slant due to that thought, and distracted it.

"I'm the only one that lives here with you, Dan"

I said, jokingly, pushing these wild thoughts behind me as if they didn't exist.

"You never know!" Dan executed soundly.

"Some wild pervert might crawl through our flat's window and try some freaky stuff"

"Haha, they would have to use an extremely long ladder"

Dan laughs his usual, but unique and contagious laugh that I can't help but laugh with. But, only for a split second do I get to see Dan's smile when he is genuinely entertained; how his face lights up, and cheek bones enhanced even more so by his dimples. Then, our laughter simmered down.

"Anyways do you need the bathroom?" Dan asked, turning back to the bathroom counter to find a tube of tooth paste, "I'm almost done so... "

"Um, ya. Just let me know when you're done"

"Kay"

Dan tussles his fingers through his dark, curly hair, which brings out the radiant fleshly color of his skin tone, before he picks his tooth-brush back up to commence brushing. After I closed the door behind him, I gently let out a stressed sigh through my nose as I made my way back to my room.

I shut the door and sat on my bed for a moment before I opened my laptop, and after a few moments of browsing around Tumblr- Dan alerted me that he finished. I journeyed back towards the bathroom once again and then readied myself for the shower I had waited for. I switched the faucet head near to blistering heat, and stood under the hot water as I let it relax every crevice of my body before I did my daily shower routine. Once I finished my shower duties, I stepped out, covered myself in a shower robe, and returned to my room once more and then dressed myself.

Finally ready for the day, I walk out into the living room of our flat. Although, expecting to hear the room filled with mixed noises from the Television and Dan's laptop while he casually enjoys breakfast-like an average morning spent between us, this morning is different. Instead of relaxing on the elongated sofa of ours - Dan is standing seemingly ominous; as his arm leans on the wall nearby. He's looking quite serious. As I near closer, I realize that Dan is on his cell-phone speaking to someone, but speaking very quietly.

Once Dan realized that I was walking in his direction, he looked at me, and then quickly hung up his phone right after. I thought it was strange, but I was curious.

"Oh, who was that?" I asked him casually.

Dan approached me, and then winked slyly with a devious, but entertained smile on his face, as if eluding to something else.

"You'll see" he said rather quickly.

Dan walked off into the kitchen, but as he did I couldn't help but keep those words echoing inside my head. I knew Dan better than to be thick headed enough not to know when he was planning something. But, honestly, what did he mean? I guess I will find out eventually.


End file.
